Raiders of the Back Porch

Woke up this morning to find the back porch in utter shambles. It appears we had some overnight guests with less than polite manners and questionable food tastes. I didn’t have my camera with me this morning, so here’s an overview of the crime scene:

* Big bites taken from mini foam football. Then spit out on the floor. Were they raised in a tree? A back alley? The nerve!

* Georgia’s salad bar (aka kitty grass) was carelessly knocked over on its side.

* One of Miranda’s sneakers was dragged from edge of porch to mid-porch.

* Lawn chairs leaning on porch railing almost knocked over.

* Bag of icky kitty litter waiting to be hauled to trash made for a delightful midnight snack.

Who is responsible for this?! I demand answers. Something tells me it’s this guy, and it’s payback for disturbing his afternoon nap on Saturday. Warning woodland creature: two can play at this game!*

*Though, really I am terrified.

August 22, 2007. Uncategorized. 11 Comments.

11 Comments

  1. kp replied:

    nooo…..not the foam football!

    break out the surveillance cams!

    August 22nd, 2007 at 12:59 pm. Permalink.

  2. Miranda replied:

    I will load the blowgun.

    August 22nd, 2007 at 1:05 pm. Permalink.

  3. MJ replied:

    Sounds like you got a visit from Courtney Love.

    August 22nd, 2007 at 4:24 pm. Permalink.

  4. kp replied:

    blowgun!
    blowgun!!!

    August 22nd, 2007 at 7:20 pm. Permalink.

  5. Rozanne replied:

    I am laughing so hard at MJ’s comment. Poor Courtney.

    Seriously, though, I think it’s probably raccoons. There were tons of them in Chicago when I lived there and there are bound to be even more now. Have you ever driven by the part of Rosehill Cemetery near Peterson and Western. Raccoons galore!

    August 23rd, 2007 at 1:44 am. Permalink.

  6. Elana replied:

    This is my first comment.
    I lay in awe of others punditry.
    I quiver writing this, not knowing if I will be accepted in the folds of this .org - How exactly is this a dot org? And does anyone else realize how important the word “dot” got in the last 5 years?

    Oh yeah, the raccoons in the city are massive well-fed foes of us city dwellers. Please don’t say you live on the second floor though, because then that’s freaky that it climbed up…..

    August 23rd, 2007 at 8:18 am. Permalink.

  7. collene replied:

    Welcome Elana! So happy you’ve joined the fold. No quivering necessary! :) And yes, we live on the second floor and the raccoon must have climbed up. So, maybe there should be quivering? Unless it truly was Courtney Love. Then I’m really scared. And bummed she didn’t break through the window and come in for tea. I’m not really sure how this became a dot org. Miranda just worked her magic and Wordsmifs was born. But I do know that the .org status gives us license to have lots of fundraisers and telethons!! Get me Rick Steeves on the horn post haste!

    August 23rd, 2007 at 10:03 am. Permalink.

  8. Elana replied:

    Be afraid Collene & Miranda, because I believe raccoons know how to jimmy locks, especially the ones in the City.

    August 23rd, 2007 at 12:55 pm. Permalink.

  9. Miranda replied:

    Courtney Love is my idol.

    August 23rd, 2007 at 6:56 pm. Permalink.

  10. MJ replied:

    So in other words Miranda you are saying that Courtney Love is your “Heroin”

    August 24th, 2007 at 12:17 pm. Permalink.

  11. Miranda replied:

    She is indeed. Although I prefer my Courtney Love old skool plump & skanky, not new skool emaciated and skanky.

    August 26th, 2007 at 10:14 pm. Permalink.

Leave a Reply

Trackback URI