Doorky musings
A funny thing happened when I began working for my current company, which has been housed in both the now defunct Sun Times Building (sniff) and a generic, nondescript, monochromatic (read: gray) downtown corporate midrise without a soul (sigh).
Though each of these buildings definitely has(d) their own distinct vibe and the average tenant hails from a different median age (Sun Times: old boy network; Multi-Use CorporateBox2000™: 30-somethings), I was introduced to a phenomenon I had not previously experienced at college nor at my first “real job” in the city. I was suddenly negotiating, and not always unpleasantly, the world of Chivalry and Proper Decorum, more specifically the practice of Door Holding for The Ladies and what seems to be 11th Commandment, Ladies First.
I’m not sure how I had escaped this social trapping before this awakening. Was it was all so ingrained into my brain that I just hadn’t noticed before? Of course we’ve all had the Ladies First mantra shoved down our throats since birth, but I guess I’ve either been fraternizing with uncivilized thugs or enlightened-gender-role-rejectin’ men, depending on how you look at it. Or it really could be that despite my delicate constitution, I am no delicate flower. I don’t play the damsel in distress card too often and generally feel uncomfortable receiving any special attention or undue help from our dear male counterparts. I love you guys, but really, I’ve got two moderately functioning arms. They may resemble mosquito bites, but thems muscles in there, and I can pull that chair out on my own. Obviously I am not offended by this gesture, but I much more prefer it within a I’m human, you’re human, let’s make the world a more friendly, cooperative place context.
So, I guess that’s why I was so shocked when I entered into the time warp that was the Sun Times building, and now neo-Chivalryland. I am continually thrown into awkward “you first, no after you, you were here first, no I insist after you” situations at the elevator, escalator, and convenience store line. And of course there is the race from behind to open the door thing. Except there’s one thing that throws everyone for a loop. The revolving door. Praise be to the revolving door!
My male co-worker and I have had many a conversation about the revolving door, its effects on traditional etiquette and how it quite possibly flips this whole chivalrous act thing on its head. Because really, when you think about it, the Ladies First rule doesn’t apply in a revolving door. Sending a woman into the revolving door first is like basically inviting her to shove a heavyish box across the floor. And following her in the next quadrant is the equivalent of a free ride. Yeah, sure you do a little pushing, but really, getting the door’s momentum started is the hard part. And yet the same men that insist on opening a regular door for me are constantly ushering me into the revolving door first. Now where’s the logic in that?
I don’t really have an opinion on this whole matter, but it does come up a lot. Mostly because everytime my co-worker and I get to one of our many revolving doors, he can’t not be a gentleman due to his upbringing and I’m usually on autopilot, so we end up almost knocking each other over and laughing that we can’t seem to get it all straight.
Ah, these silly misunderstandings between the sexes. Now if I could only figure out why many of the women in my building are not able to sense other life forms and choose to suddenly stop walking mid-stride causing a human pile-up behind them.
7 Comments
- Miranda replied:
Maybe they’ve just spotted Three Foot Hair Lady and can’t bear to take another step toward her!
August 22nd, 2006 at 3:38 pm. Permalink.
- tamara replied:
i must say…that was hilarious! and i especially enjoyed your use of “Doorky” in the title! nice touch, cw!
August 22nd, 2006 at 5:43 pm. Permalink.
- Michael replied:
I don’t know that world. It’s like a Jerry Springer episode where we work. Chair throwing, loud swearing, greeting one another with grunts & screams. Fortunately no one here is dating their cousin, I don’t think?
August 23rd, 2006 at 3:42 pm. Permalink.
- Collene replied:
I know. I think we were all relieved when KP broke up with Pammy Sue.
August 24th, 2006 at 7:07 am. Permalink.
- kp replied:
i had NO idea she was a he.
August 24th, 2006 at 8:28 am. Permalink.
- Miranda replied:
That’s where the prevalence of five o’clock shadow amongst your female cousins was really doing you no service…
August 24th, 2006 at 9:47 am. Permalink.
- Rozanne replied:
This brought back memories of my old job, where I worked in a highrise on Michigan Avenue. It had elevators, revolving doors, and a convenience store on the first floor, and quite a high percentage of chivalric men. You described the experience to a T!
Appropos of nothing that high rise was recently turned into luxury condos, which I find hilariously ironic somehow.
August 24th, 2006 at 11:52 am. Permalink.
